Archive for the ‘Health and Pills’ Category

A feeling

Unsure of how to move forward, sitting here in my car, having spent time in a public park trying to remember what i am supposed to feel again, but you know, that memroy eludes me.  I think i semi-understand that im not happy with the course of my life again. That i should change again, but im so tired of that now, always changing, never finding that peace of mind and soul that you hear about all the time.  Sure sure you can put on a braveface, joke about the misfortunes of others, but in the end you still look in the mirror and see the one everyone else jokes about. Its odd though, trying to stay emotionally cold and failing at it.

Self protection isnt what it once used to be.

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A need to bleed

Scraping the skin on my wrists, waiting….

Scraping the skin on my arms, waiting….

Scraping the skin on my neck, waiting….

but no blood flows.

 

Cutting the skin on my face, waiting….

Cutting the skin on my torso, waiting….

Cutting the skin on my legs, waiting….

but no blood flows

 

Carefully, opening my chest, between my ribs, waiting….

Carefully, piercing my heart with a knife, waiting….

 

but no blood flows

because, I thought you were joking

when you said you’d take it all.

Soooo Cold…….

*bbuuuurrrrrrrr*  (shivers and tries to keep warm)…..

 

ice…

and in the end

there was only two,

and after the two,

there was but one,

and upon the passing of the one

two came out again

then a bit more two

some one

more one

randomly two

 

….

being sick is weird.

Intelligent understatement and fish

Sorry I haven’t been blogging much of late, been fairly busy with life and stillness.

Been working on a number of images for submission to art sites for sale, so that’s

been taking a fair amount of my time, that, and learning how to use horrible programs

like Photoshop 🙂

 

Anyway, as always, Bounce On.

 

Y

Death inside my window

Looking out, empty space

2010_05_09_IMG_3050

But, what happens after this ?

 

Stay tuned 🙂