Archive for the ‘Health and Pills’ Category

We danced a little

We danced a little, both of us on-edge,

strangers in eachothers arms, comfort found in distance.

Our conversations are always fragrant, full of fresh summer mornings,

yet also still – like evenings laying together under snow-crested trees.

 

I don’t recall the apart-time much, fragments that wake me with 3am chills.

found listening carefully, noises inside your tummy after few drinks,

Staggered words foreboding foretelling of what’s not to come.

 

am I Stronger, I could be, not close to hillsides or rivers,

just, daisies swaying in midday heat, but stronger.

 

illusions, still plague me though, vermin at the feet of our dead,

not pushed past boundaries in need of crossing, no release,

just hanging on, slivers of willingness under duress, losing grip on time.

 

No one to reach out to anymore, anywhere are voids vast vulnerable,

safe though, safe, not here, just unwilling to be afraid of it,

lying creatures as we are, jesting for coverage both in need.

 

Swiftly quickly, left behind remnants remains left of us

no sollum sad staged goodbyes, just this corse dust.

 

human hands outreach outstretched outside us now,

pushed beyond broken, no more, no more –

found you again, at last, my last breath, you’re well.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Accidents and Food

It’s not often.

Far far in the past, 2 or so years.

Now, I have ended it.

 

And so, we wait again. 🙂

 



Exploring Life where
ever it may take me.

Tag your friends
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sites….enjoy.

IG : @asylumimages
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Lockdown day 1 – 2020-03-26

Is it over yet ?

Oh god, really, there’s a minimum of 4 weeks to go ?

The government have put a 3 month financial package together for businesses to be able to continue to ‘pay’ their employees …..  3 month package…

and we are in lockdown for…. 4 weeks.. at this stage…

don’t hold your breath for 4 weeks… this is just the beginning i assume.

 

I’m here alone.

 

In the end…


There is a girl,
who stands in a tree,

Hiding her soul,
so we can not see.

Cracks and trembles,
shakes and cries,

Screaming for justice,
in a world full of lies
As she whispers to me….
“I just want to be free”

I Once Knew A Girl,
who stood in a tree
Who took on the world,
And now she’s free.

Tree: Model: www.minh-ly.com

ASYLUMIMAGES.COM
Auckland – New Zealand

Model: www.minh-ly.com

My Friend, My Muse, My Light in dark times.


Email or DM now to book
a shoot for 2020.


IG: asylumimages
W: http://www.asylumimages.com
W: modelmayhem.com/2996604
V: https://vero.co/asylumimages

Thanks for being awesome




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Lockdown begins and 1 image.

On Wednesday night at Midnight, 2020-03-25, The New Zealand Government will place this little green country into lockdown, level 4, as they call it… see this link: Covid-19 NZ 

This is, mostly because, some fine upstanding people decided they didn’t give a fuck, and would just go do what the want….

But also, because our government didn’t give a fuck, and failed to enforce what they tried to put in place weeks ago at airports and stuff… mostly what people ignored.

 

So, for the next 4 weeks, we need to stay at home, only go to supermarkets etc as needed, avoid people, isolate, and hopefully not see it as the end.

Some of us might not be so lucky. Reach out.

As for me… I’m still waiting to hear if the field I work in is classed as an essential service… It kinda is.. I hope it is, cause 4-6 weeks (or likely longer) of no pay with the uncertainty of a job or not at the end of this…  isn’t going to end well.

One thing I know, now, living alone… is going to suck something really bad.

Let’s see how things pan out, if at all.

yeah. here’s one last thing…

Thank you to this beautiful tender soul for being my Muse, strength and guiding light when the darkness befalls me.


There is a girl,
who stands in a tree,

Hiding her soul,
so we can not see.

Cracks and trembles,
shakes and cries,

Screaming for justice,
in a world full of lies
As she whispers to me….
“I just want to be free”

I Once Knew A Girl,
who stood in a tree
Who took on the world,
And now she’s free.

Tree: Model: www.minh-ly.com

 

ASYLUMIMAGES.COM
Auckland – New Zealand

Model: www.minh-ly.com

My Friend, My Muse, My Light in dark times.


Email or DM now to book
a shoot for 2020.


IG: asylumimages
W: http://www.asylumimages.com
W: modelmayhem.com/2996604
V: https://vero.co/asylumimages

Thanks for being awesome




#Asylumimages #AltModel #Art #ArtModel #ArtNudeModel #ArtNude #ArtisticNude #BodyImage #minhlymodel #FineArtNude #FineArtModel #Femalebeauty #HotModel #Humanform #Loveyourbody #Model #ModelSearch #Nudeart #Nudemodel #Nudephotography #NZModel #influencer #Image #NewZealand #Auckland #Sony

 

The Pain of Art and the Art of Pain

I struggle to shoot anymore.

The last few years have been hard, the more I close myself off from what’s happening around and inside me, the less I feel, the less I am.

I learned a very long time ago, for me to take a photo that has meaning … to me at least, I have to have a connection to the subject.

Mostly this comes at a price, the price of love, the payment is pain, the repayment plan… well… that i think, is eternal.

I’ve done two and a half photo shoots that have any meaning to me.

both the same subject

both human

both the same

And, I can’t get past it.

 

If i can’t connect with the darkness, i cant.

if i do connect with the darkness, the repayment plan is long.

I miss that particular connection, now, in this hollow void of darkness.

i sit.

 

24 hours on – New Zealand is now closed for business.

20th March 2020 – in about 10 minutes (as of the time of writing), it would will be the completion of the first 24 hours of New Zealand closing its borders to the world.

First time in New Zealand history that this has happened.

Covid-19 is partly to blame, idiots who can’t follow instructions like “self isolate” (these being mostly tourists and some dumbass locals) are mostly to blame.

As of this time, we now have 39 confirmed cases, up 11 from yesterday’s 28.

I don’t agree with the border closing, but, I do.

It was realistically the only option available to try and stem the stupidity.

However, this has a greater effect than just stopping people entering the country, it also effectively stops us leaving.

And guess what it’s done for my mental state of wellbeing, considering I now feel so totally powerless and helpless, that I can’t reach out and assist someone that is dear to me, who is stuck in Australia.

So close, so very very close, yet so fucking far now.

The internet, made the world smaller, distance wasn’t a issue, we have emails, VOIP, instant messaging, many ways of keeping in touch, and it was fairly easy (though somewhat costly) to buy a ticket and fly somewhere… but for now, and who knows how long, we are trapped again, imprisoned within this country, within our minds, within… these bones we exist around…

Trapped and broken.

Now what.

I went into town this evening (friday night)… and it’s quiet…. usually full of party-goers.. now, it’s quiet.

I think of my friend in Australia, and it’s still quiet, aside from the screams of frustration echoing eternally inside my bones..

I feel broken.

One of the stabilities I had in my life, a crutch, an emergency relief, was that I knew if things got too bad, I could just buy a plane ticket and fuck off for a while… escape the maddening screams that touch me every time I walk into my house, or sit in my car, or think about the time we spent together enjoying each others friendship and that soulmate style bond… the screams grow louder … and yes, I know I’m not really escaping, because this issue, these problems, this frustration and anxiety .. is all in my head, and it travels with me all the time.

Since yesterday, or even the few weeks I’ve had to manage again by myself, I’m restless, hardly getting any more than 3 or 4 hours sleep… cursed with lying awake in bed, no distractions other than my mind making things worse than they need to be, causing me to panic, and oh, that’s the other fun part, the panic attacks again… something I’ve not had for … well… over 20 years… are back… they welcome me every morning, accompany me through my day, and lay me to rest through sheer exhaustion each night. for 3 or 4 hours, then we start again.

We all carry our own personalised hell with in us. some of us get to sale through hardly noticing… some of us notice.

Broken.

And I don’t know what to do.

Broken.

Life has taken a darker turn for me of late. I pretend that I can see the dim illumination of hope, but, as I said, I pretend.

Broken.

I miss you my friend. You may never read this, maybe I hope you might, mostly I don’t think you ever will, but mostly, I don’t know if we will ever see each other again.

Thank you for everything. just in case.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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