Rain, weekends and cheese
For the man of distinguished decent, the cheese has always been a social event to look forward too.
Representing the coming of mouldier seasons in earths history, this event has inspired many young man whose dreams of stardom and frivolity have never been seen since.
I the early 1830s many were conscripted into the moldwars and as such, learnt their respective trades within this now distinguished and highly respected cottage industry, though lacking any real relation to cottages, or even cottage cheese.
The accepted founder of the moldwars, a Sir Chives McStinkyblock, was oft refer to as McCheesy by mistress of many years Miss Suk, whom it has since been discovered, was a prostitute of high standing (usually 5’6”) and well regarded within the industry as having a vacuum-like absorption for all that is cheese.
Come the latter part of 1836, Sir McStinkyblock and Miss Suk toured widely around the greater UK and Europe, tirelessly promoting their “newly invented” Cheese Vacuumed techniques and trying to encourage others to adopt this and develop it into their own cunninglingiusary food form.
This carried on for what we believe to be a number of years, and into the turn of the 1900s, where as chance would have it, they met two Frenchmen posing as likeable humans…. from this union, they forged a new and groundbreaking technology called ‘Bipolar Multitapped HardlyInteresting TechnicalName’ device, which was rumoured to, if used correctly and inserted three times, bring the owner substantial cheese.
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